Clueless
More and more I am letting go of the online dating. Hence why the posts are spread out. I message guys once in awhile but for some reason I have never met anyone. Maybe I just don’t want to meet anyone, at least through the web. I am talking to guys that for some reason don’t push for a meet. Why is that? All I get is guys messaging me on the site saying how hot I am, and what not. So if I message you back it sorta means I want to meet, right?
In any case, lets talk about the really juicy information. You know that last time I had told you guys that me and dream guy had agreed that we were dating. I honestly believed that everything was going alright. We talk for awhile every other day and if not we at least text each other to see how we are doing. I have been trying to be as nice and supportive as possible and always as interesting and intriguing as can be. I am really trying my best to keep this guys interest but I really am at my wits end.
The last time we saw each other was on Halloween, where we spent day and night together and I met his family. I had voiced my feelings about how seeing each other so infrequently was upsetting and that although we are both busy and it is difficult to make time to see each other. Also the fact that he lives in another state is not helping. Anyways, I proposed the idea that we should see each other for shorter periods of time but more frequently so that a month doesn’t go by when we get the opportunity to see each other. He actually liked this idea and agreed that too much time had passed without us seeing each other.
I had assumed wrong. My 21st bday came and went and he couldn’t come down to the bday celebration I had planned with all my close friends. Even my ex-boyfriend (but still close friend) came, what the hell? Does that make sense? I thought he wanted to be a part of my life but then he misses the most important days of it.
Point is, I am the one that pushes and says that we should see each other this weekend or that. Yeah, maybe I am not as busy because I am not a first year law student, but I am a graduate economics major and thats still pretty time consuming. This is Thanksgiving week and I have been hoping that I could see him at least for a bit this weekend, I mean come on, its been almost a month. He said the long wait wouldn’t happen again. Here I was thinking that everything was going to be alright and that we were going to see each other when I got back from visiting my family but guess again. I didn’t talk to him yesterday so I messaged him asking how he was and the usual. Apparently he was doing a final project and couldn’t talk. He later said that he was in a bad position and that he might not even get the chance to see his family. Which of course means that if he can’t see his family he definitely cannot see me.
I am fed up with not being able to deal with this. I simply said that I was sorry to hear that he couldn’t see his family and that he shouldn’t be thinking about me anyways. He should call me after he’s done with finals. When he does call I am going to have a serious talk with him and let him know that if things are going to be like this I can’t keep falling for him because I am definitely more involved than he.
The End.
-M
